Showing posts with label Lauterbrunnen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lauterbrunnen. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

What I Learned in Switzerland

What I Learned in Switzerland

1. Don't trust anyone from the Czech Republic 
according to the lovely woman at the desk
...or anyone from the Eastern Bloc
...cuz that's isn't totally prejudiced or anything...
Not that it matters that not only am I Czech but also Polish and German
...Eastern European mutt and proud of it right here.

2. Apparently the entire town of Lauterbrunnen knows when a Czech man is in their midst. 
Turn your locks...oh wait, you don't have any...

3. Dancing on tables singing Spice Girls and N***** in Paris and Miley Cyrus, in that order, is totally normal and totally epic.

4. Swiss people go crazy over 'a little wind.'

5. Switzerland does not need to be in the EU because they are financially stable enough not to need it. This is because of all the money they basically embezzled after the Nazi's couldn't get their money back out of their Swiss bank accounts. I have quite an opinion about this and it is not a positive one. 


Monday, December 9, 2013

Day 11--Lauterbrunnen, Switzerland

April 29th, 2012


This. Weather. Sucks. The wind is too strong and we cannot go up the mountain or skydive. Noooo!!! I am so frickin’ sad I wanted to do it so badly! I would have felt so badass. Ultimate sad face.

So we spent the morning writing. Went and sat at a bar. Walked up a hill to overlook the town. Breathtaking. Wow. I couldn’t believe where I was in my life. How did I get so blessed? I felt so lucky to be sitting there enjoying lunch just overlooking the town. God’s work. It was a perfect day.

We walked around the little town, saw some Swatches and Swiss Army knives. Went to a cafĂ© where they had this book swap thing where you can exchange books. They actually had quite an impressive collection! Lots of populat books! Except they had a copy of The Historian and it was so destroyed I had to walk away, it was too sad. But since I didn’t get a book in France, I bought an English UK edition of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. I’m saying I bought this in Paris and it counts as my daring sword fights, magic spells, and princes in disguise book. I almost bought The Alchemist for Switzerland to count as my inspiration book but I decided I didn’t need it…I have to watch the luggage weight after all.

And we got hot chocolate! Check! It actually tasted only okay but still, gotta do it. Rachel talked to the waitress and she told us about a walking trail to see waterfalls inside the mountain. Sweet.



So we set off and it should have only taken about 30 minutes to walk there…it took 50. I was so slow, my hip didn’t hurt but it was weird achy. I finally found a walking stick which helped kind of. Teresa kind of irritated me because I was getting kind of cranky because I was kind of hungry, my hip ached, like wtf? I just got off crutches 4 days before we left. You’re gonna be a doctor so you should know that the way I pushed this hip to walk probably wasn’t the best way to go. Rachel and Jarrah were all, ‘we’ll take a bus back, are you okay?’ So nice and supportive. Teresa? Opposite. I ask one time, not even in a mean way, ‘how much farther?’ and I get massive attitude and this response, ‘Well do you wanna go back? It closes in 20 minutes and then this walk is for nothing.’ Whoa. What the fuck. I just got off crutches and limped about
3 miles. Show a little fucking compassion. Some future doctor. Do I still feel this way? No. was I pissed and enraged at the time? Yes. So I didn’t talk to her the whole time we were in the mountain. Took my pics, saw the waterfalls, and had a good time. It really was cool. It reminded me of that movie Gold Diggers for some reason. It was cool. AND the elevator up the mountain was like a mine shaft. So of course, I had to drop a District 12 reference…obvi.


We did catch the mine shaft down and started walking back, which clearly I was dreading…however, the man who ran the elevator drove up and asked if we wanted a ride. Now I must premise this with yes, objectively this is a very, very bad idea. Random stranger man, foreign country, accepting to get into a car…BUT this is the safest country we will be in, these people don’t even put locks on their doors, my hip hurts, there are 4 of us, it’s down the road…well, giddy up, let’s go. One safe ride and we arrived at our hostel all in one piece. Solid. BTW, the second he asked if we wanted a ride, 2 thoughts popped into my head. 1. Only Teresa and me 2. How do I get in these situations?

So one of the Team New Zealand girls was outside and goes, ‘who is that guy you got a ride with?’ L.O.L. We totally called that in the car that we hoped these bitches would see us riding in style—well, you know what I mean. THEN 2 other Team New Zealand girls came out and told us the lady inside asked who we were, about how dangerous it is, we were so unsafe, yadda yadda yadda. These bitches are so passive aggressive and catty I just wanna punch them. Shut up already. Keep wearing your “trendy” clothes in bumfuck Switzerland, population 20 and wasting a perfectly good outfit on nobody. You’re so cool. I can’t stand these girls. After this encounter, we all decided to be as obnoxious as possible. Might as well live up to the perception. You’re nobody until you’re talked about.

Dinner was amaze. Chicken with roasted potatoes. *drool* We started drinking a little after that and another tour group had arrived and we were challenged to a flip cup game. Oh. Hell. Yes. Fools. You don’t know who you’re dealing with. 30 minutes later these idiots finally got organized. We were the anchor of the team. Duh. And after a very nerve-wracking observation of the front half we pulled it out and legit dominated. Holla! We ended up talking to the other group and were super cool…while the people from our group went back to being hermits. Have fun!


Drank a little more and eventually got on the tables to dance. Eesh, I am so not like this at home. Going out in other countries is so much better than at home. Must bring out my wild side. Of course, our fan club were very keen observers. Such loyal fans we have. This place was hot as hell by the way. I was sweating like I was in a boiler room. I had to sleep in my underwear because I just couldn’t cool down. Oof. 


Friday, December 6, 2013

Day 10--Lauterbrunnen, Switzerland

April 28th, 2012

After another very restful night of 4 hours of sleep, we're back on the bus. Croissant breakfast and eggs--tasty. Everyone on the tour was all, ‘oh, how are you feeling? What time did you get in? Blah blah blah.’ Shut up. Story trying to pretend you actually care when in reality you’re wishing we looked and felt like shit because you know you’re lame as hell. I don’t know what’s wrong with these people that they don’t want to go out and have fun. I mean, that’s fine, do what you want but don’t judge me for my choices.

Anyways, got a seat to myself which was glorious. Totally able to curl up and sleep sporadically. Various stops throughout the day until we got to Switzerland around 5:30 pm. The scenery during the drive was (of course) beautiful. Pictures don’t do it justice—again. You can’t see the depth and color and intricacy of the landscape. It’s ridiculous. The cabin we’re staying in are nice. Only bad part is that the bathroom are like across the street. No lie. It’ll be fine.

The optional for Lauterbrunnen are the train up the mountain to the highest point you can get to without being a legit climber. Totally want to do that. And skydiving!! Out of a helicopter!! Made of a glass floor!! Over the Alps!! Eeep! Sign me the F up. YOLO. However, the weather is debatable due to the wind so I’m HOPING it all works out because I wanna do this SO badly. It’s just a little wind, right?

After settling in we had dinner at the bar at the camp grounds. This is the bar where all the coasters are all over the walls and hanging up! Teresa said Adam and his sister have coasters somewhere in here; he wants her to find it…good luck with that. In Swiss fashion, we had fondue; so good!! I love using the little skewers. We stayed around for a little while chatting and hanging out but hell, we partied hard last night, we were tired and left to journal. And get a good night’s sleep in prep for skydiving!!